


Thermodynamics

by DeadlyGlacier



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga
Genre: Ed being mature, F/M, Gen, Parental Roy Mustang, Pining, Sad and Happy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-11
Updated: 2021-02-11
Packaged: 2021-03-18 04:01:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,382
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29362191
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DeadlyGlacier/pseuds/DeadlyGlacier
Summary: Edward calls Roy one night for some advice.  Slight Royai.A companion piece to my EdWin story, Chemistry—but it isn't necessary to read both.Rated Teen for mild and vague discussion of sex (Ed basically gets "The Talk").May add some other one-shots to this, or just make it a series.  Haven't decided yet.
Relationships: Riza Hawkeye/Roy Mustang
Comments: 9
Kudos: 45





	Thermodynamics

_ So this little diddy is a companion piece to my other FMA story, Chemistry, but it isn’t totally necessary to read that one to understand this one. It’s just from Roy’s perspective of the phone call Ed made to him when he needed advice, and I didn’t want to include it in Chemistry because it would have been too repetitive, but I also couldn’t stop thinking about Roy’s side of it, so… here we are. _

_ Enjoy! _

**Thermodynamics**

**RM RM RM RM RM RM RM**

Roy put a hand to his face and sighed exhaustively as he filled out his paperwork. It amazed him. No matter how high he climbed up the military ladder, there was always paperwork to be done, and the piles only got higher and more complicated.

Thus, his procrastination tendencies were at an all-time high.

He grumbled, pulling another form from the ‘To Do’ pile on his desk and setting it in front of him. He'd taken off his military jacket a long time ago, even his gloves. Now, he had his sleeves rolled up and his shirt unbuttoned a little. His back ached from being hunched over, his knees hurt from sitting for so long, and his eyes were tired of reading the boring language on page after page of “proper procedure.” It was getting late —nearly tomorrow, even—and there was still at least a third of the pile left.

_ ‘I’m going to have to pull an all-nighter,’  _ Roy thought with a sigh.  _ ‘Hawkeye is going to chew me out for this, I know it. It’s my own damn fault.’ _

His desk phone rang, startling him enough to jump and roll back in his chair a few inches. He checked his pocket watch to make sure of the time. “Who…?” he asked aloud to his empty office, and then all at once panic flipped his stomach. It was Hawkeye. It  _ had _ to be. She was calling his office because he didn’t pick up when she called him at home. 

She  _ knew. _

“Dammit,” he cursed, putting his hand on the receiver. He took a breath, picking it up, and answered it with all the casual ease he could muster, “Hello?”

“Hey, uh, this is General Mustang’s direct line, right?” greeted a voice that most-certainly did  _ not _ belong to Riza Hawkeye. “My name’s Edw—”

“FullMetal,” Roy confirmed, sitting back in his chair. His panic dissolved, replaced with genuine confusion. “To what do I owe the pleasure of your call…” He checked his watch again, “...at almost midnight on a Wednesday?”

He heard Elric mutter a curse on the other end of the line, and then he spoke clearly, “Oh damn I’m sorry—er… sir. I should have checked the time before I called.”

“No, it’s quite alright,” Roy told him, relaxing back in his desk chair. “I’m staying up late these days.”

“Heh,” Elric laughed. “I imagine so.” He coughed lightly. Roy’s curiosity piqued. There was something off about the kid’s tone—he was nervous about something. “I was wondering… Well, first—is this a secure line? You’re not with anyone else right now that might overhear?”

The panic returned in Roy’s gut, and at once he was alert. What had happened? He knew FullMetal was out west. All his worst fears began to bubble to the surface in his mind: homunculi, Philosopher’s Stones, chimera… If FullMetal was calling him in the middle of the night, it had to be bad. “What is it? What’s happened?” he asked seriously. He leaned forward onto his desk, “I’ve been assured my direct line is beyond secure, Ed. Speak freely.”

“It’s not anything like that!” Elric said quickly, the pitch of his voice high. He relaxed, “Sorry, it’s just… It’s kind of a personal, private issue I wanted to talk about.”

Roy’s unease didn’t go away, but he dropped the serious tone cautiously. “Oh,” he said. “Okay then. Still, speak freely.”

There was a pause on the other end, and then Elric said, “I need… I need some… advice.” He coughed again, “Er… woman advice.”

“Oh really?” Roy asked, amused. He relaxed back into his chair again. “I suppose I’m flattered you chose to call me for this, FullMetal.”

Elric snorted, “Don’t get too excited. I don’t really know that many men to talk to, at least ones that haven’t tried to kill me over the years. Or women, for that matter.” Roy shrugged, considering that—it was a fair point. “It was between you, Havoc, and Teacher,” Elric told him.

Roy threw his head back and laughed heartily. “I can see how I’m the least objectionable option in that trio.” No doubt Havoc would have been entirely useless in that regard, or at the very least steer him in the wrong direction. As far as Izumi Curtis, she seemed like the kind of woman who had… unusual tastes. Granted, he didn’t know her too well—but he’d heard the stories.

“So you understand, then,” Ed said flatly.

“I do,” he chuckled. “Well, what do you want to know?”

Ed began to explain his situation. Apparently, he and Winry were in the beginning of a relationship. Roy remembered her—he liked her. She was one of the few people in FullMetal’s life that could actually get through to him when he was being stubborn. She was someone who deeply mattered to the Elric boy (to both the brothers, really) and he clearly cared about what she thought—even if he didn’t admit that when he was younger.

Now it seemed, from what Ed was telling him, that they’d grown close. Before he’d left for his studies in the west, Ed asked Winry if she wanted to be with him. She accepted. (Though, Roy thought there was something about the way Ed told the story that made him think that there was something Ed was hiding. If Roy had to guess, those weren’t the exact words Ed had used.)

“But we haven’t brought it up since then,” Ed was saying. “So we’re kind of unofficially-official, if that makes sense.”

“I see,” Roy said, considering what he’d been told. “Congratulations are in order, I suppose. Good for you, Ed.”

“Thank-you.”

Roy smirked to himself, leaning back in his chair, “And I trust I’ll receive an invitation to the ceremony whenever you set a date?” He always found it amusing to tease FullMetal.

Contrary to his expectations, the words “Of course, sir,” came from Ed, and not a growled (or shouted) insult. 

_ ‘Damn,’ _ Roy thought, raising his eyebrows.  _ ‘Either he’s really matured in the last few years, or he’s desperate for help. Or maybe it’s a bit of both.’ _ The latter may be wishful thinking…

He heard him clear his throat on the other end, continuing, “So… We exchange letters pretty often, and in her last one she told me she missed me—I’m planning on surprising her, but…”

Roy waited expectantly, “But…?”

Ed struggled for words, “I haven’t, er… We haven’t…” He trailed off, and Roy could hear the kid trying to say it without saying it.

He understood, “Ah.”  _ ‘Now I get it…’ _

A sigh of relief came from the other side of the line, “So I was hoping we could when I get back, but I’ve, um… I’ve actually never…”

“Oh,” Roy said, his eyebrows raising even higher than before.

“I mean, we haven’t even kissed—”

“You proposed to a woman you haven’t even kissed?” Roy questioned, amused.  _ ‘Oh, I know he didn’t mean to tell me  _ **_that_ ** _.’ _

“So we did it a little backwards!” Ed said defensively in the gruff voice Roy was all too familiar with by this point. “I bet there’s a lot of women out there that would find that romantic!”

“Easy there, FullMetal,” he said, even holding his free hand out as if Ed were in the room with him. “It’s just surprising to hear.”

“Yeah, well,” he grumbled, going quiet again. “You gotta remember, General—I’m a small-town country kid. We both are. It might have been different if we grew up in a city somewhere with lots of different people around us…” He trailed off for a second, and then for the first time in a long time, Roy could hear how young Ed really was—barely a man—saying, “Winry would be my first… my first everything—first kiss, first love, first… you know. And if I’m lucky, she’ll be my only.”

If Roy were a softer man, a different man, he might have cried. Instead, the cold gears of ambition in his mind stopped entirely. The world went quiet, and he let the genuine, unexpected warmth of Edward’s admission pierce him right through the heart. An annoying lump rose in his throat, one that wouldn’t go away.

“What?” Ed asked, annoyed again. Roy didn’t know how long he’d been silent. “You sitting there laughing at me?”

Roy swallowed hard, hoping his next words didn’t waver with emotion. “No, Ed, I’m not laughing at you,” he managed. There was definitely an odd sound to his voice, but he pressed on, “Actually, I… I think that’s very admirable of you. Of the both of you.”

“Oh,” he said. “Well, thank you.”

Roy coughed into his hand, trying to shake himself free of the emotion. “So you need to know a bit of everything, then?” he guessed.

Ed answered, “Yeah. I mean, I’ve studied all kinds of anatomy texts over the years, but only in the alchemy or medical sense. I need a more… testimonial education, I guess.”

“Well, alright then,” Roy said with a firm nod to himself. He stretched a bit and made himself comfortable, “You’re going to want some paper and a pen…”

Roy was pretty shocked to find out how little Ed knew about women and sex, but after thinking about it, it shouldn’t have been. The boy had lost his mother at a young age and committed a terrible sin to try and get her back, a sin that literally cost him an arm and a leg—and  _ almost _ his little brother, the only family he had left… A sin he devoted years into undoing, and accomplished that goal—all at the cost of a normal childhood. 

The strength and determination it took for that had always amazed Roy. And now, he could understand and forgive some of Ed’s outbursts over the years.

Not all of them—but a lot more than he had in the past.

Ed had grown up without a father as well, and while Roy’s situation wasn’t exactly the same in Ed’s case, he certainly understood the absence of one’s father at such a pivotal point in life.

So Roy was determined to be every bit as helpful as he could for Ed, to tell him everything he himself wished he’d known at that age—and was more than glad to do so.

By the time they were done, there was only a few hours until dawn.

“But like I say, Ed,” Roy told him seriously, “the first time is probably going to be awkward for you, specifically. It’s more important that you make sure she’s comfortable at all times, because contrary to what a lot of other men might say, it is not supposed to hurt for her—she shouldn’t bleed, cry in pain, or anything like that. If you follow what I’ve told you to the letter, you should be fine.”

“Okay,” Ed replied, just as serious.

“I  _ mean _ it, Ed,” he said firmly, pointing his finger across his desk at no one, eyes narrowed. “No soldier of mine—whether they’re in active duty or retired—is going to be known as some kind of predator. Do you understand me?”

“Absolutely, sir,” he said earnestly. “I would never want to hurt Winry. Ever.”

“Good,” Roy said with a satisfied smile. “Otherwise I’d be forced to catch the first train to Resembool and arrest you myself. Then I’d have you executed.”

Ed snorted on his end, “God damn, I get it.”

Roy was smiling, “I’d put your head on a spike.”

“I believe you!” he said loudly.

“Good,” Roy said again, examining his nails. “I expect a full report next week, FullMetal.”

Ed began to sputter in shock and anger, “What?! I don’t work for you anymore, you bastard! And besides I would nev—”

He chuckled. It was just too easy. “I’m just kidding,” Roy assured him. “But really, I  _ will _ execute you if you hurt that girl.”

Ed sighed in defeat to his absurdity, “As you should… I need to get to bed, General. Thank you for your advice.”

“Of course, Ed,” Roy said gently. “In all seriousness, I do hope it goes well for you. Good luck, FullMetal.”

“Thanks, Colonel.”

“That’s  _ General _ to you!”

“Whatever!”

Roy chuckled when he heard the line cut abruptly, and he set the receiver down. He stood up from his chair and stretched, letting out a long, tired groan. While a bit of an awkward conversation, it was a welcome distraction.

And yet…

That lump in his throat was back, and again he thought of Ed’s words.

_ And if I’m lucky, she’ll be my only. _

Roy sighed and turned to his desk, picking up the framed picture of his old team. His eyes looked at each of their faces, but they settled on Hawkeye.

On Riza.

In that moment, oddly enough, he thought of Envy, and what he’d told it:  _ “You’re...  _ **_ugly_ ** _.” _

Roy had promised himself he’d never go back to that point, but now it nagged at him, and he knew why.

He knew _ exactly _ why.

He was better than this and he knew it, but for a moment… for just  _ a moment,  _ Roy allowed himself to feel it.

To wonder...

To dream...

...to be  **_ugly_ ** _. _

In the early hours of Thursday morning—before dawn broke, before he started on his paperwork again, and before he got the chastising phone call from Riza—Roy thought about what it would be like to be a small-town country kid, and the only obstacle between him and the love of his life was an old dirt road.

**RM RM RM RM RM RM RM**

_ I promise I’ll write some Royai in the future, but for now, this is all I got. Hope you enjoy, loves! _

_ Stay safe, healthy, and warm, _

_ Glacier _


End file.
